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INT. FINAL CLUB - NIGHT




MARK (V.O.)

BILLY. OLSEN.

PM

11.

MARY, (V.0.)

PM

AND SHE CAN

CAN

SMILES FROM THE HEART OF A FAMILY MAN

COMMON PEOPLE

PAUL YOUNG

WE

WITHOUT A PATCH FOR THE PARTY TO GO

TEARS FROM YOUR LITTLE SISTER

WHERE THE RAIN CAME THROUGH

WATER IN THE MILK FROM A HOLE IN THE ROOF

LIVING ON FREE FOOD TICKETS

PAUL YOUNG

EXT. HARVARD SQUARE - NIGHT

 

As MARK continues on, he passes a group of people heading in

the opposite direction for a party.

As MARK's steady and determined stride continues, he'll. pass

by all kinds of (seemingly) happy, well-adjusted, socially

adept people.

The vocals from the Paul Young song come in--

 

 

 

 

 

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

 

 

CRYING 'CAUSE SHE DOESN'T HAVE A DRESS

 

 

BUT YOU KNOW SHE'LL GET BY

 

CUT TO:

 

INT. KIRKLAND HOUSE/LOBBY - NIGHT

 

As the MUSIC CONTINUES and MARK busts into the lobby of his

dorm. He doesn't look at anyone as he heads up the stairs and

 

 

CUT TO:

 

INT. MARK'S DORM ROOM - NIGHT

 

A bedroom that's part of a three-bedroom suite. The MUSIC

CONTINUES as MARK walks in, flicks his lap-top on without

looking at it and walks out of frame as we stay on the laptop.

 

 

'CAUSE SHE'S LIVING IN THE LOVE OF THE

 

 

 

DADDY'S GONNA BUY YOU A DREAM TO CLING TO

 

MAMA'S GONNA LOVE YOU JUST AS MUCH AS SHE

 

 

Then a moment or two later, a glass with ice gets set down

next to the lap-top. Then a carton of orange juice followed by

a bottle of vodka.

MARK's fingers dance easily on the keyboard---like a Juilliard

pianist warming up.

In the exact time it takes him to pour the vodka and orange

juice over ice, the website he's just called up gets loaded

onto the screen.

Zuckonit.com

This is the only place he's comfortable.

 

TITLE:

 

He begins blogging.

 

Erica Albright'•s a bitch. You think

that's because her family changed their

name from Albrecht or do you think it's

because all B.U, girls are bitches?

He takes a good gulp of his drink. We see the words we're

hearing filling up his computer screen--

 

MARK (V,O.) (CONT'D)

Folks, for the record, she may look like

a 34D but she's getting all kinds of help

from our friends at Victoria's Secret,

She's a 348, as in barely anything there..

False advertising.

 

CUT TO:

 

 

INT. MARX'S DORM ROOM - NIGHT



 

Fresh ice gets dropped in the glass and a new drink poured.

"Love of the Common People" continues.

 

TITLE:

 

in back of MARK, sitting on the bed and hitting a bong, is

 

 

The truth is she has a nice face. I need

to think of something to help me take my

mind off her. Easy enough, except I need

an idea.

MARK has moved his mouse to an icon on his desktop labeled

"Kirkland Facebook". He clicks and opens it. A menu of photos

appear. He blogs again.

 

MARK (V.0.) (CONT'D)

I'm a little intoxicated, I'm not gonna

lie. So what if it's not even 10PM and

it's a Tuesday night? The Kirkland

Facebook is open on my desktop and some

of these people have pretty horrendous

f acebook-pics. Billy Olson's sitting here

and had the idea of putting some of these

girls' faces next to pictures of farm

animals and have people vote on who's

hotter. .

 

CUT TO:

 

 

We'll be cutting back here a lot in this sequence, with the

Paul Young song tying them together, as we show---mostly MOS---

preparations under way for the hottest party on campus

tonight.

We start on a good looking STUDENT fixing his tie in the

bathroom mirror. He walks out of the bathroom and into the

main area where he's immediately tossed a bottle of champagne

by a similarly dressed STUDENT. We see that there are a

couple of dozen other guys around. Our guy takes the champagne

bottle and sticks it on the bar, which is being stocked by two

sexy FEMALE uniformed BARTENDERS.

Our guy walks past P. DJ's table where the DJ is setting up his

incredibly high-end equipment.

Our guy trots down a set of mahogany and red-carpet stairs,

opens a heavy door and looks out to the sidewalk.

 





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