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Homesickness
Problems You Can Expect If you find yourself going to bed early, getting up late, writing long letters daily, feeling melancholic, and thinking about your home, you will know that you have reached the homesick stage. You must do something to bring yourself out of it. The wrong thing to do is to give way to your feelings and sit around the house brooding about home. The right thing to do is to step up your activities, assay to speak English to your family, make friends, and spend more time studying. The homesickness is real and you should not brush it aside. Acknowledge it, become more restless, and enjoy your experience as an exchange student. The homesickness will soon pass. Jealousy The children in your host family will probably be jealous of you at some point during your homestay. Younger children will be very excited to have a new brother or sister but when they notice that their parents are paying attention to the newcomer, they become resentful, which is normal behavior in any family. Think how you would feel if your own mother and father started to pay that much attention to a new member of the family. You are now sharing the parental affection that was formerly given only to them. Jealousy is expressed in different ways by children of different ages; you will be able to sense their feelings or resentment to you. When your host brothers or sisters make remarks about you, or complain that you “do not do your share”, the wrong thing to do is to “fight back”. The situation was caused by the attention you received, or the fact that you seem “too special”. The right thing to do is to slow down and observe yourself and your family. Turn your host parents’ attention toward their own children’s achievements, and do not talk too much about your own accomplishments. You may want to discuss the problem with your host parents so that they can handle the children. This situation will not persist if you do not compete with the other children for attention. Let them have it if they need it, and remember that anything they may have said about you while they were feeling jealous of you was not really meant. They will soon forget it and you should too. Money Your natural parents are responsible for providing you with the spending money that you need during your homestay. At first, you will probably need some assistance from your host parents in working out a budget. You are used to different currency and prices for goods, so it is best to have some help until you are thoroughly familiar with our dollar and its value. Let your natural parents know well in advance when you are running out of money so that you will not have to live on borrowed funds until your money arrives. It is a very bad idea to borrow money from your host family. Plan ahead so the need will not arise. When you arrive in your host city, find a bank which has a corresponding branch in the city where your parents live. Your parents can then wire money directly into your account. Sending money through the mail or through non-corresponding banks can cause considerable delays. If your natural parents have provided you with large amounts of money, you should spend it conservatively, and in accordance with the customs and habits of the other children in your family. If you spend extravagantly throughout your homestay, your American family may resent it. On many occasions they have to reduce their spending in order to provide certain things for you. Please be sensitive to this.
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