II. Tales

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JJJ

JJJ

JJJ

JJJ

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Jack was young, rich, and fond of girls. He hardly ever did any work, and spent most of his time enjoying himself.

One summer he bought a big motor-boat. As soon as it was ready to go to sea, he telephoned to one of the girls he had met somewhere, and invited her for a trip in his new motor-boat. It was the first of many successful invitations of this kind.

The way Jack used to invite a girl for a trip in his boat was like this: he would begin by saying, "Hullo, Laura (or whatever the girl's name was). I have just bought a beautiful new motor-boat, and I would like to take you out for a trip in it."

The girl's answer was usually cautious, because everybody in that part of the country knew Jack's reputation with girls. She would say something like this: "Oh, really? That's nice. What name have you given to the boat?"

Jack would then answer, "Well Laura, I have named it after you."

Of course, the girl would feel very proud that Jack had chosen her name for the boat out of the names of all his many girl-friends, and she would think that Jack must really love her. She would therefore be quite willing to accept his invitation to go for a trip in his motor-boat.

It would not be until she got down to the harbour and actually saw the boat that she would understand how cleverly Jack had tricked her. Because there in neat gold letters on the boat she would see its name — 'After You'.

A man was tired of living in his old house in the country and wanted to sell it and buy a better one. He attempted to sell it for a long time, but was not successful, so at last he decided to solve the problem by using an estate agent.

The agent promptly advertised the house, and a few days later, the owner saw a very attractive photograph of it, with a wonderful description of its gardens, in an expensive magazine.

After the house owner had read the advertisement through, he hastened to telephone the estate agent and said to him, "I'm sorry, Mr. Jones, but I've decided not to sell my house after all. After reading your advertisement in that magazine, I can see that it's just the kind of house I've wanted to live in all my life."

Jean was a very beautiful young girl, so she was quite used to some men showing their admiration for her, and to others being confused and shy when they saw her.

One summer, when Jean was travelling abroad, she went into a cafe in a small town, sat down and waited to be served.

The young waiter was talking to someone at the bar when she came in, and at first he did not pay any attention to her, because he had not looked at her properly. Then he turned round and saw how beautiful she was. His face went bright red, and he hurried over to take her order.

"I'd like coffee without cream, please," Jean said.

The waiter hurried out, and came back a few minutes later without the coffee.

"I'm very sorry," he said, "but we haven't got any cream. Would you like your coffee without milk?"

April 1st is a day on which, in some countries, people try to play tricks on others. If one succeeds in tricking somebody, one laughs and says, "April Fool!", and then the person who has been tricked usually laughs too.

One April 1st, a country bus was going along a winding road when it slowed down and stopped. The driver anxiously turned switches and pressed buttons, but nothing happened. Then he turned to the passengers with a worried look on his face and said, "This poor bus is getting old. It isn't going as well as it used to. There's only one thing to do if we want to get home today. I shall count three, and on the word 'three', I want you all to lean forward suddenly as hard as you can. That should get the bus started again, but if it doesn't, I am afraid there is nothing else I can do. Now, all of you lean back as far as you can in your seats and get ready."

The passengers all obediently pressed back against their seats and waited anxiously.

Then the driver turned to his front and asked, "Are you ready?"

The passengers hardly had enough breath to answer, "Yes."

"One! Two! Threel" counted the driver. The passengers all swung forward suddenly and the bus started up at a great rate.

The passengers breathed more easily and began to smile with relief. But their smiles turned to surprised and then delighted laughter when the driver merrily cried, "April Fool!"

Mr Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found that all of them had already been taken except for one. There was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not taken the one by the window; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.

When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said, "This seat is reserved for proper load balance. Thank you." Mr. Robinson had never seen such a notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must be carrying something particularly heavy in its baggage room which made it necessary to have the passengers properly balanced, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit in.

Two or three other people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on. Then, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl stepped into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside him and in this way succeeded in having the company of the girl during the whole of the trip.

A gay young man, who earned his living as a drummer in a band, had just married, and he and his wife were looking for somewhere to live. They saw a lot of places, but there was always something that one of them did not like about them. At last, however, they found a block of new flats which both of them really liked. However, there was still the problem of whether they should take one of the ground-floor flats, which had a small garden, or one of the upstairs ones.

At last they decided on a first-floor flat — not too low down and not too high up — and moved in. After they had bought furniture, carpets, curtains, and all the rest, they gave a big party to celebrate the setting up of their first home together.

It was a gay and noisy party, as all the host's friends from the band came and played their instruments. The guests danced, sang and practised on their host's drums.

Soon after one a.m. the telephone rang. The hostess went to answer it in the hall, and after she had finished, came back with a happy smile on her face and said to her husband, "That was the man who has just moved into the flat downstairs telephoning, dear. I am so glad we decided not to choose it. He says it is terribly noisy down there."

Mr and Mrs Davies had left their Christmas shopping very late. There were only a few days more before Christmas, and of course the shops and streets were terribly crowded, but they had to get presents for their family and friends, so they started out early one morning for the big city and spent several tiring hours buying the things they wanted in the big shops.

By lunch-time, Mr Davies was loaded down with parcels of all shapes and sizes.He could hardly see where he was going as he and his wife left the last shop on their way to the railway station and home. Outside the shop they had to cross a busy street, made even busier than usual by the thousands of people who had come by car to do their last-minute Christmas shopping.

Mr and Mrs Davies had to wait for the traffic lights to change, but as Mr Davies could not see in front of him properly, he gradually moved forward into the road without realizing it. Mrs Davies saw this and became worried. Several times she urged her husband to come back off the road but without success. He could not hear her because of the noise of the traffic.

Finally she shouted in a voice that could he heard clearly above all the noise, "Henry! If you intend to stand in that dangerous position a moment longer, give me the parcels!"

THE COUNTRY MOUSE AND THE CITY MOUSE

Once upon a time a city mouse visited his cousin in the country. The country mouse shared his simple but wholesome food. Peas, barley, corn, tasty roots were stored in the mouse's home in the field — and another store of food in the big farmer's barn — for when it rained.

"I find the country-side charming," the city mouse said to this open-hearted cousin, "but your food is so plain, and your home quite dreary."

"Do come to the city and live with me; we shall play in my luxurious home — and will have a banquet each day — all the delicacies your heart desires."

So they left the blossoming green country-side to the busy, yes, even frightening city. The noise, the traffic, the hurrying, bustling crowds jostling each other was almost too much for the simple country mouse.

"Here we are at last," said the sophisticated city mouse as they entered into a huge towering mansion.

The house was elegant... chandeliers, deep carpets, plush furniture — and a pantry that was full of the very best food ever seen. Swiss cheese, salty bacon, delicious fruits, colorful vegetables, jellies and fresh bisquits — all were there, ready to eat.

Hungry from their long journey, the city mouse and the country mouse began their feast, tasting one mouth-watering bit of food after another.

Suddenly a heavy door slammed, loud footsteps of big boots were heard — the threatening deep purr of an angry cat chilled the air.

"What was that?" the country mouse stuttered.

"Oh, that is the master with his big Siamese cat."

"Good-bye, cousin," the country mouse squealed as he leaped through the hole in the pantry wall. "I'm going back to the meadow in the country. I prefer to live with the woods, the tall mountains and the fresh gurgling streams rather than in your exciting city."

Дата добавления: 2015-05-31